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Meghan Markle’s heartache as members of the royal family ‘flinched’ at her hugs, book claims

Meghan Markle reportedly created an awkward atmosphere within the royal family, with some members visibly flinching when she attempted to embrace them, according to claims in a new royal book.

Royal author Tom Quinn, in his latest book Yes Ma’am: The Secret Life of Royal Servants, explores the inner workings of the monarchy and reveals that Meghan’s affectionate, hug-everyone demeanor clashed with the family’s traditionally reserved nature.

Meghan Markle Left ‘Hurt’ After Royals Flinched at Her Hugs, New Book Claims

In an excerpt published in The Times, Quinn writes that Meghan’s instinct to hug people made senior royals like Prince William, Princess Kate, and King Charles uncomfortable.

“Tension developed between William and Harry as a result of Meghan’s warm, friendly, hug-everyone approach,” he explained. “Kate, William, and Charles tended to flinch when she moved in for a hug.”

Meghan, 43, was reportedly “understandably hurt” by their reactions, as physical affection is second nature in California, where she was raised.

One notable moment allegedly took place when Meghan attempted to hug a senior royal aide. Quinn described the aide as a “stiff Old Etonian equerry.”

A palace staffer claimed the aide “flinched as if she’d tried to poke him in the eye.”

The Duchess of Sussex previously spoke about this cultural difference in Harry & Meghan, the couple’s Netflix docuseries. Meghan recalled being surprised at how formality extended beyond public settings.

“Even when Will and Kate came over and I was meeting her for the first time, I remember I was in ripped jeans, I was barefoot. Like I was a hugger, I have always been a hugger,” she shared. “I didn’t realise that is really jarring for a lot of Brits.”

She had assumed the royals would be more relaxed behind closed doors, only to discover that the formality remained.

“There is a forward-facing way of being, and then you close the door and think, ‘OK, we can relax now.’ But that formality carries over on both sides, and that was surprising to me,” Meghan explained.

Prince William ‘Recoiled’ from Meghan, Prince Harry Claimed

Prince Harry, 40, also recalled an awkward first meeting between Meghan and Prince William in his explosive 2023 memoir, Spare.

According to Harry, William was visibly uneasy when Meghan greeted him with a hug, calling it a “classic collision of cultures.”

“[It] completely freaked him out,” Harry wrote. “He recoiled. Willy didn’t hug many strangers. Whereas Meg hugged most strangers. Will had hoped that she would greet him with standard reverence per protocol, but she didn’t know it, and I hadn’t told her.”

Traditionally, the royal family avoids physical contact in formal settings, favoring handshakes, bows, or curtsies.

Harry has previously spoken about the lack of physical affection he received growing up.

However, in recent years, there have been signs of change. Despite his initial hesitation toward Meghan’s hugs, King Charles has shown a more affectionate side in public.

In September 2024, he made headlines when he broke tradition by hugging the New Zealand Women’s Rugby Team after they requested an embrace.

“Yeah, we all wanted a hug,” player Ayesha Leti-I’iga told Charles. “But only if it’s okay with you.”

To the team’s delight, the king agreed, replying, “A hug? Why not!”

After the group embrace, he joked that it felt like being “flattened by a scrum” and described it as “very healing.”

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